This Means War star Chelsea Handler may be single — but don’t expect to see her describing herself as a “blond comedian who loves long walks on the beach.” The actress says she won’t be making an online dating profile anytime soon.

“Oh my God, I don’t know if I could ever date online,” she tells iVillage exclusively. “I don’t like dating to begin with. Dating is just too awkward. You can’t just like meet for coffee — it’s just too weird. And I can’t do it sober!”

But the one person Handler will hang out with sober is her BFF (and costar in her upcoming comedy, in theaters Feb. 17) Reese Witherspoon. “The last couple times we hung out we haven’t even had drinks,” says Handler, 36. “She said to me the other night, ‘God, we’re having a lot of sober time together. We better get refocused in the new year.'”

Watch our exclusive video to find out why Witherspoon refuses to drive up Handler’s driveway and why Handler “feels more comfortable” talking to the film’s director, McG, when his hand is on her boob.